never have me fully
by fluffy-sessho-sesshy-ice-pack
Summary: poor sesshy is the only male in heat. catching the attention to other male in the family and out. oh its mating season too! watch as sesshy run away from it all. lemons, rape, angst, abuse, and romance. who will win sesshy's heart!
1. before the story begins!

** hello ppl! its me! with another great fic! plzz read and enjoy!!  
**

** Never have me fully **

**Summary:** sesshomaru is the only male in his family that goes into heat and keep given off fumomones, which catch the attention to the other male in the family and out. Oh! And its mating season too! Watch as sesshy run away from it all. Lemons, rape, angst, abuse, romance.

(before the story begins my readers need to know a few things! warning this is very short so dont worry i will update in a few days)

_ Little sesshomaru was sleeping in his safe warm bed. Dreaming that his mother was still there with him and his father. Running and catching each other like they used to do. For anyone might know touga and miduki divorced and miduki kept most of their children except one. Which is sesshomaru. He has to stay with his father because the lord need a heir. Miduki plead the inu council to switch because she notice that sesshomaru is a uke and not a seme. Which __**will **__cause problems in duty and family relationships. _

_ You see if an heir is uke from a lord who is a seme. The lord will treat the uke as a seme. Constantly changing the uke into a semi-seme. The seme lord always like to see their sons seme in everything because they are males. The seme lord will forget or overlook the fact that the heir is uke. Since the seme will think his sons is born a seme. He will treat the uke cruelly to be a better, stronger, guarded, seme, but if you treat a uke that way without the guidance from the mother. The young uke will be dysfunctional and emotional unstable. Which is bad cause usually the uke is caring and innocent demons. And lets not forget a little dense along the way._

_ Such harsh cruelty treatment will shove the poor uke over the edge of his sanity. Oh yes the uke will be very powerful under the unnoticed guidance by the seme, but it comes a major price on him like once the uke comes to heat the very first time. The seme will take him even if he has a mate its demons law. The parents get to choose which to take. Once chosen the uke will be pregnant by them once every year until the uke chose a mate that the parent see fit. Which in this case will be the next 200 years._

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plzz review on what you think of it so far. :)


	2. the past and nightmare

**srry readers no internet 4 nearly 2 weeks(which sucks!) but dont worry im here!!**

_ He was obvious that his father towered over his small frame. Lying against him was a heavy book that read " the history of past lords from the north, east, west, and south" in ancient demon language. Displeasure and disappointment was the expression on his father handsome face of how his son spent the night sleeping instead of studying._

_ The boy's father name is touga, but known as lord inutaisho the lord of the western lands. The greatest inu who ever lived. The said lord slowly closed the book, thinking of what to do next. He takes the book in his hands and roughly slams the book on the sleeping inu. Affectedly awaken the child with a yelp of pain. The wounds he receives just open itself again for the fifth time this week._

_Staring up at his father, he was meted the intense glare as always when he wake up to pain._

_"you disappoint me." was all touga said in his gruff stern voice. Not waiting for an answer, he quickly grabs a fistful of sesshy's hair and drags him out of bed. Sesshy totally off guard didn't respond well, trying to stand to ease the pain he felt and obeys his father at the same time. Touga pulled a little harder on the hair, rushing the little inu to his feet as he walk out the room to his destination, the dojo. Upon seeing the dojo in sight sesshy try to pry his father grip on his hair. He started to kick and scratching when his father tightened his grip and pulled on upward and forward harshly. Making sesshy silently cry out in pain. Touga watch this little display by the corner of his eye._

_"next time, don't fall asleep when you study." he said pulling more hair for good measure. Earning him a pained whimper. He can see his son scalp is sensitive like his ex-first mate. Watching the blood that was forcefully coming out by his hard pulling. Seeing his son pathetic attempt to hide his face, silently crying. 'this is not what a seme should act.' thought to himself._

_"sons of mines don't cry" he said. Disgust was clearly showing on his face as those tears escape sesshy's eyes. Reaching for the door to the dojo. Touga felt soft, but sharp fangs like teeth digging in his wrist. The same wrist he held sesshy. Without looking he can see sesshy desperately try to escape his punishment. He's face stay stoic as ever and punch an unexpected sesshy's face, which affectedly jerk the fangs off of him. Sesshy hit the cold hard ground with a 'thud' in no time._

_ Sesshy realize this little moment to escape. He crawled as fast as his little body can. For the brief moment he thought he can get away._

_'please let me get away please-ahh!!' he mentally scream. He felt the strong grip of his father around his small ankle. Dragging him back to his father, his personal tormentor._

_ The only person that bring real heavy fear to his heart. Ever since he was a reason why his mother couldn't see or talk to him. He was the reason why he felt useless and helpless. The only real mother figure he has is the female servants and maids, but that's not much help either once you think about it. That's the reason why he pushes himself harder and/or face the tormentor. Sesshy figure he was just a title. A title to bring respect and honor only to prove how strong, respective, and honorable his father truly is._

_"im not finish with you… we have quest that are staying with us later on today. If you do as told for once in your life. you might have the rest of the day to yourself." came the gruff voice of his father._

_"yes father." sesshy softly say. Touga nodding in approval, he grab his son shoulders and push him inside the dojo. Before sesshy can react to escape the door was shut firmly in his face. Which mean he's trap with his tutor for the next 3 hours….. … … .OH NO!! see in the dojo you have to quickly get armed or faced a eardrum shattering of yelling and get badly injured. Risking your own life to your personal combat tutor…..with no patient at all… good luck buddy.._

_Sesshy quickly ran to grab a sword to defend himself as his tutor rushes toward him yelling_

_"YOUR LATE!! WE BEGIN NOW!!" sesshy almost peed his pants by the raw murderous intention his aura give off. After finally reaching his sword. He quickly spin and block an attack to his head. 'eep!' he thought as the tutor change stance and strike at seeshy side. Where a sensitive bruise was at. On reflex sesshy drop to the floor and rool away from the enraged tutor/ he quickly stand and attack the madman of a tutor, but he was out of sight and reappear behind sesshy. Sending a roundhouse kick to sesshy shoulder, but block it with his trusty sword._

_"GOOD YOUR IMPROVING!!" the tutor yelled right directly in sesshy super-over sensitive ears. Sesshy yelp in pain, but quickly get away. Turn and bow to his tutor. You see sesshy have a deal with his tutor. He yells at him when he senses touga around and talk normally when they are alone. He help with swordsmanship and a unique fighting style. It's called the gentle fist. (neji and hinata from naruto! J ) its where he push his demonic energy into your opponents body to stop, damage, or paralyze their muscle. Which he find out that its to his advantage. He did pretty well, but still on the second level. There is only three level in the gentle fist style._

_ The first level is to picture very nerve and muscle in a body and do little damage. You have to know where is less or more fatal to any muscle into the body. You must train your body to last to a extremely large amount to store for any battle at all. The little damage you can do id temporally stop, damage or paralyze._

_ The second level is harder than the first. You have to force the demonic energy through the tip of your finger no hand to hand contact. The person need to make it as thin as a needle and long as one too. It take a lot of patience and concentration. It can cause more damage than the first._

_ The third level is far deadly then any level. It can stop the growth of a demon, cause mental and physical problems like: lose sight, deaf, and speech. Stop brain functions, dizziness, and dullness. Dissolve muscle and tissue. Constant twitch or jerking of limbs. it's a heavy damages to muscle, nerves, and tissue. Changes the way a body works. It can cause temporary black outs and even temporary death or death._

_ The gentle fist is very dangerous usually a teenager learn this but since sesshomaru have free time. He choose to work with it in the dojo. Sesshomaru is a genius when it came to fighting or learning different styles._

_"ok start on your needle practice while I sleep…" sesshy nodded while the tutor fall to the ground asleep. ' ok I can do it.' focusing his demonic energy and push it through his fingers. A small blue glow of energy radiating through his index and middle finger._

_"now make it thin and sharp as a needle." the blue glow thin out and sharpened_

_"now hold that shape for 45 minutes!" his tutor said watching him. "I thought you was asleep?" sesshy said sweat drop, tutor smiled. "I lied."_

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**(hi! readers the real first chapter is here so enjoy and leave reviews! tell me what you think of it so far! bb's)**


	3. the guest and unwelcomed guest

_**hey my patient readers! After this chapter I need some more ideas to continue. I keep getting reader block so much -and school is not helping- hopefully I can get it back.-crys- miss my creative ideas- maybe more readers can give me an idea…. I can only wish. Well on with the story!!1**_

_Never have me fully 3_

Touga was now taking the remaining picture of his late mate's picture down and replace them with scenery ones. He will make sure that all of her remains will be selled before their quest arrive. He'll be damned if they think there going to be pictures of his late mate still on his walls. Grabbing the last picture. He walk down to the entrance which wasn't far from where he is. One or two turns and he'll be there, a male servant bow down at him when he exist.

" my lord." he said. Touga stop and nod.

" is there anything else needed to be changed?"

" make sure there's no trace of my late mate belongings in the castle. Sell them if you have to.," he said, walking away. Not given a second glance to the servant who had a frown on his face, but did as told none the less. ' I hope you know what your doing, especially to prince sesshomaru' the servant thought. While checking every hall and asking other servants to check with him.

2 minutes later

Upon reaching the front gate. Eager buyers buy most of his late mate belongings such as pictures, clothes, furniture's, jewelry, and make-up. Some was still looking for another picture which he have in his hands. A loud 'ah-hem!' reach the buyers ears and also there undying attention to rest on the lord who wiggle the last picture. Just to see what will happen. The ones who wanted another picture item, eyed each other before racing with money in their hands. The lord smiled a bit and handed the painting to the one with the most money and said a quick 'thank you' before he turn and walk away, back into the castle. He excitedly check everything was new looking for his guest, when they arrive.

10 minute time skip

" congratulations you reach the 3rd level! Now I have nothing to teach you and good luck, my prince."

The tutor bow deeply and sesshy did the same. Since 3 hour passed, he ran out with his ex-tutor closely behind. who look very happy to leave this place at any second now.

" try and be reasonable, prince sesshomaru you might just like them like the lord does. They might put a shining light in your life." sesshy look at him funny, but nod anyway.

They walk up to the entrance and gasps. … what they looking at was totally different from this mourning when they passed. A servant came and placed a vase of flowers on the table by the window.

"who did this!?!" the normally soft voice was now more a high pitched with anger and disgust.(sesshy) the servant jumped to see the tutor and prince looking at her for an answer the prince oh so wanted.

"now!!!" the prince shouted, high-pitched again. She bowed and said " the lord wanted the whole castle arranged and redecorated before the guest arrive today."

Sesshy look around again and notice all of his mother's stuff was gone ( from sight)

Around the entrance.

"where is all my mothers stuff!!!" not waiting for an answer, he bolt through the castle, to every room, and hallways. Everything that gave the place a warm and cozy home feeling is now gone and replace with other less appealing things and pictures that just don't look right. As if someone just put different color furniture into a room. It just didn't fit. Everything he use to find his way around the castle is now gone. The place look so much different then he remembered, its like walking into a strangers house but you swear it was your house then anything. Pain, hurt, angry, hatred, helpless, and disrespected was how he felt. His father, tormentor, and lord would do this just for some guest? It doesn't make any sense to him. If he was the lord and not his father he will leave things as they are. If it was just guest right.. RIGHT!?! Anyway this seriously confuse the poor prince. He knew his common sense is right like it always is. ( snooty booty!!) ' so why this piece of information……this doesn't make any sense!' he thought as he made his way to the library, thinking this over and over until he reach the door.

To sesshy complete surprise the door flew open and knock sesshy hard on the floor.( and a good feet away) touga walk out as if nothing has happen.

" pick yourself up sesshomaru, it's disgraceful for the heir. You need to get dress and wait for the quest to arrive. Remember they will" walking away " be staying for now on. No question asked" he said coldly. To bad that sesshy have to ask anyway

" are they relatives?" this question stop touga in mid-walk and turn his head to look over his shoulder.

"it's none of your concern if or if not our relatives. You will treat them with respect and try to get to know them. I would be very disappointed. You know what will happen when im very disappointed, don't you.," he sneered. Sesshy wince at the comment. He quickly stand before his tormentor had the chance to kick him… like he always do when he didn't get up when first told. with confidence he walk straight pass his father, praying he look dominate and not submissive as he kept walking. Only sama know the tormentor is still staring him down. Shaking the unwelcome unease feeling away, sesshy kept walking down the hall.

" keep your head up high and back straight" the gruff voice said sternly. Sesshy nod slightly and recompose himself. keeping his anger to himself and walk calmly to his room, away from his father. Once safely in his room.. He mentally rant. 'he hit me on purpose!!' he thought angrily shouting in his mind. Narrowed glaring eyes staring nothing in particular as he absentmindedly undress himself to wash in the hot spring like bathroom.(connected to his room. I want that…-crys-) 'if I go some where, he always there: getting slam into doors one minute then belittle me in the next.!!' he thought, slipping into the water moodily

------ 20 minutes later-----

After slipping on his shirt, he walk out his room, shutting the door. heading to the front gate. There.. Lining up is the servants, maids, gardeners, chefs, and security guards. Waiting to see who will be staying from this day forward. Sesshy watch all of them looking forward and already there is whispering before going to stand next to the lord.

"at least you're here. First impression is everything." touga said as sesshy seated himself, not saying a word. He watch as a small dot came into view

-------------sesshy p.o.v. ½ hour later-----------

I immediately scold when it was a human female and a half-breed little boy that climb out of the carriage. when the little boy ran excitedly to my father. I watch my father did a complete 180 turn in his figure. (o.o) this totally surprise me when the little boy say 'daddy!' to him. So of course I know now why the sudden changes was done and why they was staying.' I cant believe he didn't tell me sooner! Such pain was running through my veins that it's a numbing tingling sensation. 'I knew it!! As soon as mother was gone he'll chose another female, but why? This is so unacceptable!!! It hurt to say or even think this any more. Feeling the stinging in my eyes. 'no don't cry don't cry!!!' I shouted mentally. I thank god that I know how to mask my feelings from others 'thank you tutor' I quickly watch the scene in front of me which almost made me gagged. This filthy human was hugging him… just like mother used to!! The pain increase tenfold. before I can deal with this a soft babyish voice interrupted me.

"hi! Im Inuyasha what's your name?" asked the little boy named Inuyasha. I stare at him "sesshomaru" I said not wanting to even speak to him or anyone at that.

"do you live here?" he ask me again. Which I almost want to lash out on him for even bothering me in this depressing mood im in.

"yes" I stare at him. Knowing he will be quiet a chatterbox. "good! You and me can play together and stuff!" he said excitedly. Play… play its been so long since the last time I played. I don't know what it feels like anymore. I nod not trusting my voice. Feeling someone looking at me , I turn and both adults was seeing our small conversation. ' stop looking at me you ugly filthy human scum bitch!!' I thought looking at the human.

"this is izayoi and Inuyasha, they will stay here for now on." my tormentor said. looking at me. I nod and half bow knowing of what will happen if I don't.

------normal p.o.v-------------

"what s your name?" izayoi ask warmly. They lock eyes with each other "sesshomaru" he said, looking now at a tree. She frowned . Not expecting his reply to be so emotionless for such a small boy.

"is he ok?" she asked touga, looking at him. " he's fine." sesshy heart sank a little further. The pain increased. "just need time to adjust." he said glaring at sesshy for having his new mate worry over pity things like sesshy's feelings.

"adjust my ass!!" a male voice said. Everyone gasps. Touga growled angrily, and sesshy smiled a little. A man or demon jump in front of the lord. The man look just like the lord too, both staring each other down. Until the look alike swoop sesshy in his arms. Sesshy giggled a little when the look alike spin around in a circle.

" ishi what are you doing here?" sesshy asked

" just want to see my lil bro and the lord new mate and son" he said now identify as ishi. ( my name!! stay back its copyright! Stay away from the name.)

" I have a gift for you" ishi said looking at sesshy. He gave a confuse look.

"close your eyes." in his kind, sweet voice only sesshy will get. Sesshy did as told and felt ishi moving him around

"what is your favorite color?" ask a voice that was very familiar but cannot recognize it. Confuse by this and a low growl from his father, but he ignore the warning growl and said indigo blue.

" open your eyes now" giggled "sesshomaru" the female said ' I know this voice' he thought as his eyes shot open.

" mommy!!" sesshy said and 'mommy' pull him out of ishi arms and hugged him tightly.

" hey my baby boy!! Miss me." she said. Sesshy nodded and whisper " please take me with you" he said, starting to cry his heart out in his mother's embrace, breathing deeply in her scent.

" I wish I could, but I cant." she said whispering back. The hard truth was getting sesshy very upset and hateful.

" stop that!" she said to him. " being hateful will only drive your sanity to a breaking point. You need to medicate more to make you mentally and physically calm and a better handle of your emotions." sesshy sniffed trying to stop crying and listen better for what his mom wanted him to hear.

"it also improve and intensify your sanity and healing power, but here this is a book I want you to follow, it'll help." she said before whispering in his ear.

"when you open it. It'll be blank, just write a question or statement and it'll write an answer before the text disappeared. Its like a person answering your questions no matter how dumb or smart it is. It'll answer anything you ask." she whispered. Softly scraping his scalp. Noticing the dry blood lumps and knots there.

'look what he done to my baby boy' she thought in despair. Softly pulling her hand out of sesshy hair. "do me a promise. I want you to stay out of trouble and be good ok?"

"… it'll be hard but ok." he said calmed down enough to actually speak. 'mommy' set sesshy down and hand him the book. The book was small, but big enough to write on and it a pretty indigo blue cover with a crescent moon on it. He placed the book inside a hidden pocket in his kimono.

" I'll come and visit you soon, but we must go now." ishi said eyeing an enrage lord. Saying there goodbyes, they left. And sesshy was happy that they came over to see him. e release a happy sigh Irritated, touga order everyone inside except sesshy. Sesshy paled already knowing that this will ruin his happy mood for the rest of the day. He sigh preparing himself, he watch as everyone hurriedly went inside. After it was the two of them, he spoken

"how dare you bring her back in when we was greeting!!" he yelled in his gruff voice.

"I didn't! I didn't know they will come over my lord!" sesshy protest, panicking a little.

"silence!!.. You are in no place to speak!!" he yelled with authorities laced in his commanding tone. Which stop sesshy from protesting any further. Regretting he very said that, sesshy bowed his head in defeat. He knew better, his father will not listen to him…

_---------------------------------------------------------------_

_Wow it took me a few days but I finally have this chapt done. Plzz review and send some ideas pllzzz!!! I can feel the writing block coming back!! -crys- pllzzz save me…….!!!????!?!???!??_


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